eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

I'm still deaf two days after the gig.

I kept getting hit in the face with broken guitar strings.

I'm pretty sure my internal organs were temporarily re-arranged by the noise.

That, ladies and gentlemen, is why Mogwai gigs are so brilliant.

Clank and Dangle

I bet you're feeling smug, sat there in your centrally-heated room in front of your computer. Maybe later you might watch some TV. Or just vegetate on the sofa. I bet you're thinking about how last weekend was great because you did some cool shopping or went drinking with your friends.

Well FUCK YOU smuggo, because last weekend, I got up at 5am on Saturday, walked for ages and then spent hours and hours feeling utterly freezing cold. At one point I got hot-aches in my hands so bad that I wanted to puke my skeleton out with pain. I lost count of the number of times I thought I was about to plummet to my doom that day.

Yeah. Who's jealous now?

Oh.

Ill Communication

Well, it's that time of year again when all the infectious beings on the planet instantaneously attempt to nest in my respiratory system. Yes, I'm being melodramatic. I'm a man with a cold.

Thing is, by the nature of where I'm living (a reminder: Like Paper St in Fight Club) I'm not exactly best positioned to recover from any bugs and whatnot so I've still been going to wrok and giving everybody else my plagues. But it's less draughty there so nuts to everybody else.

Anyway, what with every gland in my body competing for the title of 'most swollen and painful' I had a thought. Maybe there should be an animated film about a madcap inventor and his dog who shrink themselves down and have a zany yet educational adventure through the human endocrine system.

It could be called A Gland Day Out.

Hey! It's the Sun!

OK, so it's sunny and cold today, which is happy weather for Stevious.

On top of that, I get my new clipper leashes for my ice-axes tomorrow (for those who know not what I'm on about it's a bit like getting a TFT monitor for your computer - not strictly necessary but sooo much nicer to use).

Yipee, hurrah, grin grin grin etc.

Having said which I do still want to find the scoundrel who's thieving my food at work, nail them to a large plank of wood and launch them into a pit of burning tar.

Autumn blues

Right, this whole wet and cold thing is starting to piss me off so I make no excuses for the negative content of this post. In no particular order I wish to complain about these things:

Bread Thief! Whoever keeps stealing my bread at work is a cunt of the highest order. If you want free bread go to the fucking salvation army.

Music at climbing walls. It's not the 1980s. Nor is it some redneck trailer aprk in the states. Or a youth club. So please stop playing Iron Maiden to me. It's not funny and ironic and it doesn't inspire me to climb. It makes me want to brick the stereo.

The people who live upstairs. Please put on another CD, as I grow somewhat weary of Oasis' worst hits. And yelling at the television is something that gurgling toddlers and elderly hermits do. Furthermore, WHY THE FUCK DOES ONE OF YOU KEEP HUMMING JINGLE FUCKING BELLS LOUDLT AT 8 IN THE MORNING? Bunch of retards.

Internet cafes. Porn mags are cheaper and you have the benefit that you can wank over them to your hearts content. Looking at porn in an internet cafe is demeaning for all concerned, and totally pointless.

That'll do for now. I feel better already. Bring on the winter.